The Keg Party

So, there I was at a keg party last weekend, hard to believe I know. Well I'm sitting there with my two friends at a party in which we know no one and I look across the fire to observe a very peculiar site. Let's start by saying that there was a girl who decided to put her hair up with chopsticks, potentially cute yes but not when they are sticking up 4 inches from the top of your head like a rabbit ears antenna! So we of course named her Chopsticks. Poor little Chopsticks she was trying so hard to be cool and get involved in the general conversation but just seemed to "stick" out like a sore thumb. So as I look back over to her she pulls a red floppy book out of her heinous handbag. Upon closer examination I realize that the book looks very similar to a bible. Oh yes my friends, the pages were trimmed in gold - it was a bible. Immediately I alerted my friends, sure that this was about to get interesting and entertaining. This girl busts open the Bible and starts making comments like, "sweet" and "yes!" Apparently the Book of James is very exciting. Of course someone finally asks the question we've all been wondering, "are you reading the Bible?" Chopsticks then informs the group that she is just referencing something she had read earlier that day, mind you this was in between her sipping her beer. She continued to read by fire light until she had lost everyone's attention and then she moved on to a group of guys who were standing in a circle talking. The next thing I know she is removing her chopsticks and shaking her long blond hair out like some porno star, there was a noticeable silence as everyone thought they were about to experience a strip tease, from bible reading, beer sipping, bimbo! All in all it was very interesting, I mean don't we all read the Bible at a keg party while drinking beer????